When you just want to give up

A poem from me to you.

Magnificent

Dearest,
You are a magnificent creature
Yes you are, don’t argue
You are significant
Sometimes a little extravagant and a little arrogant
but I love you.
So when you tell me you’re giving up I can’t believe it
Can’t even conceive of you not giving life your all
You are a rare and fiesty, gleaming beacon,
There is no reason for you to despair
I know times are tough,
That you’ve been through the ringer and it’s rough
You don’t think you’ve got the stuff to make it through, and what if it never improves?
What if this illness is all there is for you and depression will never leave you?
What use is there to go on living, if it’s always in tears?
Shut up. I don’t want to hear that from you.
Not ever.
You have not ceased to be
so stop telling me you’re an ex human being
Darling, remember what you’ve got
The sun shines down on you every day, no matter what.
And if the sun goes out today, you’ve still got the stars,
let them be your navigational charts
And if they all blink out, and go extinct,
You’ve still got the firelight, even if it means setting fire to your life
When it all goes up in flames, you’ll have the light from the blaze

And if your sight goes too,
I’ll always be here for you
We’ll paint pastel pictures with words,
Go on safaris across the earth,
and I’ll describe it all to you

And when your hearing fails
Your beautiful heart has the words to recall all this beauty back to you
You’ll see the colours that only God knows can be
Far more than the limited mixture of our three best primaries.

When all the world has slipped away into permanent dark
You’ll be in good company,
I’ll be beside you all the way,
Holding your hand, making you stay here on this earth
Where you truly are a person of worth

And you’ll keep writing for the world
So long as your fingers can find the keys
And if not, I’ll transcribe all your witty words and purple verses
And you can freestyle to the beat of your own drummer

And when your voice dries up and is no more.
You’ll have the rush of oncoming air.
I’ll take you sledding in the snow
And we’ll go running on a ribbon of desert heat.
We’ll have the salt spray of ocean sailing,
The mischievous wind making trails in your hair
Tying promise knots in your long hair
I’ll be there to untangle them and make sense of the wilderness outside you
And your smile will guide me through the darkness,
Because yours is a brilliant beacon.
I’ll never leave you.
And when the strength of your muscles fails,
And your smile is forever gone,
I’ll listen to the song of your breathing
And touch talk to the tips of your fingers

And when all the world has left you out of touch
And you can’t be sure if I’m still with you, know this much
I’ll be there inside your magnificent heart
You can call me up, and spend your days
Imagining adventures for us
We’ll play in the surf and surf in the upper atmosphere
We’ll talk about light and living and love without fear.
My laugh will ring out in your mind,
And yours will ring out in mine.
We are meant to be together forever, love.
You and I
And when only breath is left to you,
Know you’ll have me too.
And when the universe reclaims the last breath and sigh from your tired lungs,
You will always have my memory to keep with you.
No powers of dust or earth or sky can take from us this life we’ve shared,

So never ever tell me that you’ve given up,
That the long road is not worth walking,
Because long before light and sound and breath are ever taken from you,
You have me,
And I have you.

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2 thoughts on “When you just want to give up

    • Thanks Kate! I originally wrote it hoping it would be a spoken piece, but it sort of felt more like a page poem. Maybe I’ll give it another shot :)

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